Ultrasound News

Anyone who knows me for more than 10 minutes probably knows that I struggle with worry-or trusting God. Throughout ALL of my last pregnancy I worried daily. In the first trimester it was miscarriage, in the second it was preterm labor and in the third it was cord issues. And guess what??? When she came it was SIDS! And every time she leaves my arms and drives away with someone, or I leave her with someone, I consciously kiss her like it may be the last time I see her. What a way to live huh? But just like with you, He is oh so patient with me and he will spend the rest of my life making me more like Him through trials, pain, life lessons etc..

This pregnancy there has been some progess in that area. I now know, it doesn't really pay to worry so much, because what I fear, or the possibility of something going wrong is ALWAYS there. Getting to the second trimester or the third and so on, won't take my worry away. I am more relaxed in this pregnancy. I drink my small morning cup of coffee almost daily, I take tylenol, I take pepcid (I still won't eat those coldcuts though!).

But after going to our routine ultrasound to find out that our baby has a soft marker for Trisomy 18 or Down Syndrome I am surprisingly not freaking out. I think it's because having a "marker" has simply doubled our chances of a normal pregnancy of our baby having one of these problems. We are being sent to a level two ultrasound where they will look for more markers. If they find more (I think three) then they would recomend an amnio. If they find no other markers, it is probably a calcium deposit and we would just have to wait it out.

So...it is what it is. It is comforting to know statistics blah blah blah...but doesn't everything that happens to me passes through the hands of my Father good or bad? Doesn't He give AND take away??? My prayers of late go like this: Father...you can have it all...but if you decide that is what is best...then whatever you do don't let go of me when I walk that hard road after loss, heartache and pain.

So if you are reading this, please pray that by our level 2 ultrasound next week that the spot they found on this baby's heart will disapper. But ultimately that God's will, will happen and we will be OK with it.